The Power of Pause: How the STOP Method can Transform your Reactions
The Power of Pause: How the STOP Method Can Transform Your Reactions
Written by Lily Thrope
Have you ever heard of DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)? If so, you may know about the STOP skill. STOP is an acronym for: stop, take a step back/take a breath, observe, proceed mindfully. The primary purpose of the STOP method is to handle crises more mindfully. Developed from mindfulness and meditation practices, this technique suggests an accessible way to ease depression and anxiety, improve emotional regulation and increase self-awareness.
When can I use the STOP skill?
What’s great about the STOP skill is that it can be used in many different situations. You might use it before responding to a triggering text, a stressful email or an emotionally-challenging correspondence, and in a face-to-face social situation. Or, you might employ it while in the midst of an argument or in a moment of high stress, like during a frustrating traffic jam. It can be applied in any moment of crisis – major or minor.
How do I practice the STOP skill?
The first step is to simply stop. If you feel like your emotions or feelings are overwhelming, that is the time to pause, avoid impulsive actions and not immediately react. Imagine a giant, red stop sign in front of you. Ask yourself, “what has triggered these emotions?”
Next, take a step back, or a deep breath (or both!) and momentarily separate yourself from the intensity of the urge to react, defend or fight. Breathe deeply, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Bringing more oxygen into your body, and specifically your brain, helps you think more clearly.
After that, pause and observe your surroundings. Who and what is around you? What are your thoughts at this moment? What are you feeling? Anger? Grief? Anxiety? Fear? It is important to remain nonjudgmental during these moments. It takes practice to slow down your thoughts and not ‘bite the hook.’
Finally, proceed mindfully. At this point, you may already be feeling more in control. Consider what options you have to move forward. What is the right step? You might already have the awareness to proceed mindfully and with clarity.
Using the STOP skill helps to amp up self-awareness, develop mindfulness, and improve distress tolerance. Next time you find yourself in a moment of high tension, consider using the STOP skill. Don’t worry if it doesn’t serve you right away. As with all practices, a skill becomes easier over time.
If you find yourself struggling with intense emotions, consider reaching out to a mental health provider who can help you address underlying challenges. You can email us with any questions or inquiries at hello@thropetherapy.com. We look forward to hearing from you!
